Best at the Worst Times....

I would tell all my friends "I will always be there for you. I am just a phone call away if you need anything. My support for you is unconditional". Indeed my friends mean a lot to me and when i love, i love completely. In fact, i say these sentences to only few people, but to whomever i say it, i mean it.

It was one of those weeks when i was having a hectic and not-so-great week. I was facing challenges at work and was not very receptive to anybody at home or to my friends. I was totally focused on things at work which required the best out of me. i was not much inclined to having conversation with my near and dear ones. Quite often my phone was left unattended. At the end of this one week, when issues were resolved, challenges were overcome and things were more organised, i decided i would get in touch with a few friends and that's when i realised, i had missed a lot of calls from them. i was unavailable to the same people to whom i had promised unconditional time and support. Family, that means a lot to me, too had suffered due to my bad moods. Several people had been ignored and a few were hurt just because i was having a tough week. Surely, this is not called being unconditional. That's when I understood that when I tell an individual I will always be there for you, I create hope in the individual. I cause the expectation. I give a silent promise that no matter what's happening in my life, if you need me, I am going to be there.

And when I fail, I shatter the trust that one has built on me. I don't deny that there are times when I need my space, my personal time to just think, clear my head, meditate upon the question marks in my life; but i also recognise that i can keep aside an hour for this and reach out at other times.

The reason i hadn't got in touch with people was not because i was using my time constructively or finding solutions, it was simply because i was irritated, in a bad mood, and had no desire to 'give' or 'be there'.

I can be my best when i am happy and when all is going right in my life, but is it not my responsibility to be my best at the worst of times? Is that not growth ? Is that not what will set me apart? When i am the creator of my own feelings, is it not my responsibility to create happy feelings and leave the stressed ones as soon as i leave my workplace?

Even in the worst of my moods I smile at my customers, I laugh with my boss and I am pleasant to every stranger who comes to my workplace. Then why is it that when i am in bad mood, my near and dear ones should experience the worst of me ? Don't they deserve to get the best of me when they are such an essential part of my life, when my joys and sorrows are always felt by them and never by strangers?

Can i take this small challenge with myself and be my best at all the worst of times with my loved ones and live up to my promise. Winning this small challenge will create magic in all my relationships and in my life. I will be the master of my emotions, and wow, what freedom that will be !!!